It was fitting that I set out for my run this evening in the rain. The weather mirrored my state of mind: sad and drizzly.
I ran a little faster than usual, taking advantage of the cooler temperature. A mile in, the rain subsided and the wind picked up. It was a gushy wind and I was running right into it. I was thinking about Mo: how much I will miss him, how completely sucky it was to have to decide to end his life. I had to run harder to keep from crying. Nothing will stop a run quicker than a crying jag!
I outran the tears and by the time I was heading home, there was little wind and I was running in the sun. It was pretty wonderful -- seeing the sun after the rain, realizing that my run really did make me feel better.
As I reported here, I'm adding some speed into my runs in an effort to reach my goal of running a sub-24 minute 5k. So, at the end of my run today, I tacked on a few speedy hill repeats. They weren't so bad!
hugs.
ReplyDeleteand I never send that sh*t via comment :)
but I so know what youre feeling...
M.
Keep at it....glad you felt better, very nice post! :)
ReplyDeleteSorry bout Mo. Good choice to go for a run. And hey, there's no shame in running AND crying. It can be very cathartic.
ReplyDeleteMizFit -- thanks for the hugs!
ReplyDeleteMark -- Yeah, much better. The run was a good idea!
Frayed -- Thanks. I get so sobby when I cry. I can just imagine that non-runners would pass me and think, "Look at that crier! I'm telling you, Ms. Couch Potato, running is a bad thing if it makes you cry like that!"